HUMANS OF ŌTAUTAHI: VANESSA
“As a child, I was extremely self-reliant and very responsible. I think I was very good at convincing myself that I just cope really well with things. It took me a while to realise I had struggles with mental health because I think [there are] a lot of things we internalise as being normal at a younger age. It was a thing of feeling safe and approved in an upbringing where there was domestic violence; there’s been a lot of forgiveness in my family which is really amazing.
“Almost six years ago, my partner passed away; his passing was a huge painful thing for me. He struggled a lot with addiction, he was an alcoholic, and there was a lot of judgement. There was a lot of love there, but there were also unhealthy dynamics that were a challenge for both of us. I feel so thankful for him and that relationship, what we went through, it’s made me more self-aware and compassionate as a person.
“I think creativity and self-expression is a big part of healing. For me, creativity is almost an expression of the self and soul and the way you connect with other people. It’s such a great way to learn and grow and have empathy for each other; everyone can be celebrated for their differences.
“I’ve always been an avid reader, always loved painting and drawing and [I’ve] always loved fashion as well as characters, film, and storytelling. I really love acting and performing, as well.
“I love vintage clothes and the pinup community. Because I dress up – more often than not – in my day to day life, people ask ‘what’s the occasion?’. I say, ‘my life’. You want to get to a point where whatever you do with your life is an expression of being true to yourself, because no matter what, you do you can’t please everyone.
“Over the past few years, I’ve gotten more into cosplay, I’ve hardly scratched the surface of all the characters I want to dress as. I really love Michelle Pfeiffer’s Catwoman and Jessica Rabbit; always loved the glamour of her. I find that I’m drawn more to characters that are multi-layered. And they don’t have to be perfect, that’s a really important thing.
“I think the things that define me would be helping people, creativity, and spirituality. Those three things are big parts of who I am.”
